Person: Luke Argles

Dick Barton and the Slaves of the Sultan

Good evening. This is the BBC Light Programme broadcasting from London. It’s 6.45 and time for the next thrilling episode of ‘Dick Barton and the Slaves of The Sultan’!”

When Dick Barton, Boy’s Own adventurer, all-English hero and teatime wireless star, is called upon by MI5 to track down a wealthy socialite missing off the Horn of Africa, little does he know the can of worms he’s about to open. Before you can say ‘I say, that’s not cricket!’ our hero is mixed up in a fiendish foreign plot to seize control of our upright and principled British armaments industry. Good heavens!

With his loyal working class sidekicks, Jock and Snowy, by his side, Barton sallies forth encountering a nefarious criminal syndicate called the X Faction; an hypnotic femme fatale; and a run-in with that other national treasure, Squadron Leader James ‘Biggles’ Bigglesworth of the Special Air Police.

Will Barton, side-parting and moral certainty intact, win the day through British pluck and determination? Will gorgeous heiress, Felicity Buff-Orpington, escape the steamy seraglio of Zanzibar; and if she does, will the pure un-distilled manliness of the Barton ideal wilt in the face of her manifold charms? Or will assorted foreign Johnnies and homegrown villains consign Barton to an improbable cliffhanger ending from which there can be no possible escape?!

There’s only one way to find out, tune in to the next exciting instalment of: ‘Dick Barton, Special Agent…’

 

 

Radio Days Transmission Two : The War Years

After the success of our first Radio Days showcase in 2015, set in the golden days of wireless broadcasting, we’re leaping aboard our dramatic time machine and going back still further.

Transmission Two : The War Years sees us clutching our gas masks and ration books, with one ear listening to the radio and the other waiting for the air raid siren. A collection of songs, sketches and playlets, from the deadly serious to the downright funny, and all inspired by the period, means an excellent evening of new yet nostalgic entertainment for everyone.

So on with your siren suits, use gravy browning and an eye pencil if you can’t afford nylons, and make your way with care through the black-out to Coulsdon Community Centre. And put that light out!

On the BBC Home Service tonight, the following schedule will be broadcast on 668 kHz (South) and 767 kHz (North).

Welcome to tonight’s show.  Like our previous ‘Radio Days’ presentation back in 2015, this is very much a project that attempts to achieve a number of different goals. On one level we will try to evoke some of the feeling of living and surviving through the turbulent times of the Second World War. There was danger, but there was also community as people worked, and played, together to get through the storm. And a sense of humour was one of the strongest defences against a sea of troubles, from rationing, shortages and petty bureaucracy to death and loss.

On another level, this is a grand experiment, harking back to the early days of Theatre Workshop Coulsdon. All of the pieces you’ll see on stage tonight were written or adapted by members of the group. For some it’s their first time attempt at creative writing. It’s a big leap. And we’re very proud of what they’ve achieved. Almost nothing had been written when we started our rehearsals and workshops in January.  Each short play has evolved over the last three months, some easily and with grace, some more awkwardly, in fits and starts. But they are ready now, and all represent time, effort and imagination on the part of not just the writer but all the people at Workshop who’ve contributed ideas. This has been very much a team effort.

And let’s not forget the music. We have some glorious songs and voices for you tonight, accompanied by our ‘BBC Very Light Orchestra’, three talented, creative and endlessly patient musicians.

So close your eyes and be taken back in time again. And enjoy.

Warning. We are expecting atmospheric disturbances during latter part of this broadcast, which may interrupt the programme. We do hope your enjoyment won’t be too badly affected.

The Adventures of Dick Turpin

When Clemency Turnip’s Coffee House is closed down for ‘low morals’ and dealing in illicit liquor, her son Jack and serving-girl Polly Flinders find themselves out on the mean streets of 18th Century London and surviving on their wits. For Polly, it’s a path that may see her find her real parents. For Jack it’s a road to fame and notoriety as the land’s most celebrated highwayman!

Set in the colourful time of ‘Poldark’, ‘Tom Jones’ and Hogarth’s ‘Rake’s Progress’, this all-new pantomime adventure comes complete with outrageous Dame, girls dressed as boys, an audience participation song and every opportunity to boo the villains and cheer the heroes.

Will Turnip’s Coffee House be re-opened? Will moody and smouldering Woss Poldork regain the rights to his Cornish treacle mine? Will merchant banker Sir Beastlie Fugg get his deserved come-uppance? Will true love find its way?

 

A Midsummer Night’s Dream (2016)

Return to the Forest

It’s 20 years since we last put on a production of ‘A Midsummer Night’s Dream’, and here, a few of the company reflect on the play and its part in both TWC’s history and theirs…

Dan (Director)

I was 16 when I played Flute in TWC’s 1996 production. I remember coming on stage at Bewl Water and looking up at this huge sea of faces : more than 650 people had come to  see our last night. It was amazing. Later on I went to drama school, worked as an actor (and now as an agent). How strange then, but also strangely wonderful,  to be back directing the play for a new generation. Most of the current cast weren’t in our previous productions, and it’s honestly a privilege to introduce this boisterous, joyful masterpiece — often said to be the nation’s favourite play — to a new  group of young TWC actors. It’s 400 years old, and still incredibly touching, incredibly funny. Evidently the English sense of humour hasn’t changed all that much.

Rupert (Flute)

This is only my second play with TWC (my second play anywhere for that matter), and  I wasn’t sure how I’d take to Shakespearean dialogue. I didn’t even know he wrote comedies. But once I’d got the meaning sorted, it was hilarious! Full of life. A complete revelation really. The characters and their motivations are easily recognisable, even 400 years on. As for taking on Flute, well, it’s a big responsibility.  I mean, I’ve seen a recording of a baby-faced Dan playing Flute 20 years ago. I can tell I’m walking in the footsteps of giants. :^) Luckily TWC are not only a talented group, but a positive bunch of people too. Joining them has been almost life-changing. And I’m proud to be a member.

Lucy-Ann (Helena)

I grew up surrounded by Theatre Workshop, and I remember watching the 1996 production when I was just six! The fairies were magical, the mechanicals hilarious, and the lovers meant to be together. You’d have seen me then in the front row with eyes as big as saucers, longing to be involved. Now I find myself a part of the legendary love triangle/quadrangle/tangle. The fairies have all the magic, mischief and poetry, but we have the most fun. The play revolves around the lovers,. The two friends are pushed to their limits and beyond, and come out the stronger for it. The two suitors, who seem to start with the upper hand, become pawns in the greatest game of all; the desperate, crazy, selfish, blind, obsessive yet wonderful thing that is love. I love them. I love it all.

 Richard (Bottom)

I directed both the 1989 and 1996 productions of ‘Dream’ and played Oberon each time too.  Playing Bottom this time is truly going from the sublime to the ridiculous. Obnoxious yet strangely endearing, he’s one of the most famous comic characters in English theatre. I love this play because it’s such a  joyful depiction of truly English idiocy. It might pretend to be Athens, but in this play Shakespeare is showing  the English at their best and worst.  Bumbling working men with hearts of gold and brains of straw, young toffs behaving badly and yet finding themselves in the end. And the fairy kingdom, glimpsed in the shadows of the wild wood. Magical.

Radio Days – The Golden Age of Wireless

 

This year marks the 70th anniversary of the launch of the BBC’s Light Programme in 1945, which went on to provide such iconic entertainment throughout the late 1940’s and 50’s. With just the spoken word, some music and a few choice sound effects, the listener could be transported anywhere. All they needed was a little imagination. Adventure tales such as ‘Dick Barton – Special Agent’ and ‘Journey into Space’, comedy from ‘The Goons’ and ‘Hancock’s Half Hour’ and serials like ‘The Archers’ attracted millions of listeners.

As a tribute to those classic shows, we’ve put together an evening of light entertainment using the same principles. Some drama, some comedy, all linked together with music from the period.  And this format has given us an excellent platform to showcase some of TWC’s newer and/or previously untapped talents. The show has been written or adapted, with two small exceptions, by ourselves. For Joe Wilson and Sean Young it’s the first time they’ll have seen something they’ve written come to life on stage.  They’ve directed them too.  And it may be their first writing, but it won’t be their last.

So tune in to Theatre Workshop Coulsdon this March, and be transported back to a time when a young Princess Elizabeth was about to become Queen, the British Empire still covered the pages of your school atlas in pink, Dan Dare was the pilot of the future, and Dick Barton was Britain’s finest secret agent. In the post-war years, before the real coming of television, families would gather around the wireless to be informed, educated and above all, entertained. A magic combination of sound, music, voice and a sense of wonder spirited the listening nation to far-off lands, distant times or sometimes just around the corner. Bold adventure and stirring drama rubbed shoulders with surreal comedy. TWC’s ‘Radio Days’ is an affectionate recreation of those golden years of British radio, showcasing a series of short plays evoking the atmosphere of those times, with live music and live sound effects. An evening of laughter, songs and suspense*. Come along, and bring your imagination with you…

*See the Radio Times for details (a pre-1957 edition that is).

‘Slaves of the Sultan’ by Richard Lloyd

‘Wrong Number’ adapted by Paul M Ford from a script by Don Negri

‘The Night Mail’ by W H Auden

‘The Crossroads’ adapted by Richard Lloyd from an original US Radio script

‘Reginald Rare – Rocketeer Extraordinaire! (In the 21st Century)’ by Sean Young

Agatha Christie’s ‘The Lamp’ adapted by Paul M Ford from a 1933 short story

‘Murder at Monford Manor – A Harrison Harrison Mystery’ by Joe Wilson

‘The Weather Forecast’ by Les Barker

The Producers

 

The Producers was Mel Brooks’ first ever movie back in 1968. Starring Zero Mostel as Max and Gene Wilder as Leo, it became both a cult and a commercial success, and Brooks even picked up an Oscar for Best Original Screenplay. An improbable hit as a movie, it was an even less likely one as a Broadway musical, which Brooks did in 2001. A byword for tongue-in-cheek bad taste, it became the most successful Broadway show of all time, winning a record breaking 12 Tony awards and running for more than 2,500 performances over six years. And then art imitated art, as a movie of the musical based on a movie came out in 2005, starring Nathan Lane, Matthew Broderick and Uma Thurman.

Born into a German Jewish family who fled the Nazis in the 1930’s, Mel Brooks was uniquely qualified to poke merciless fun at the Third Reich. Frankly, it’s impossible to believe that anyone without his background could have got away with it. Then again, the whole premise of a couple of Jewish con-men staging a sure-fire Broadway flop based on a camp musical about Adolf Hitler is so absurd, it would be difficult for anyone to take genuine offence. Besides, Brooks has many targets for his satire in The Producers – not least the whole shallow pretentious ‘bubble’ of Broadway itself. (Which is rather ironic, as it turns out, given the huge success of the show.)

The Producers is an extraordinary musical. Set in New York in 1959, the one-time ‘King of Broadway’, Max Bialystock, sees his latest show ‘Funny Boy’ close after just one night. Down and out, dependent on playing the aging lothario to wealthy but very elderly spinsters and widows, Max is thrown a lifeline back to success and the high life in the unlikely form of timorous accountant, Leo Bloom. Bloom discovers that a flop show can make more money than a hit, and so the two set out to lie, cheat and schmooze their way to a million bucks by staging a sure-fire Broadway flop – the worst taste musical ever written: ‘Springtime For Hitler’. The rest is showbiz history. Bursting with laugh-out-loud jokes and outrageously funny musical numbers, The Producers is pure, unadulterated joy.

Now it’s fair to say that Theatre Workshop Coulsdon are not, first and foremost, a musical group. But we do like projects that are a bit unexpected. So we’ve rescued ‘The Producers’ from the cold dead clutches of of the light-operatic am-dram circuit, and given it the down-and-dirty TWC makeover it deserves. We aren’t dancers, we aren’t singers. We don’t have the required 37-piece orchestra. But we do have a bunch of talented musicians and chutzpah to spare, and what could be more in keeping with the spirit of Mel Brooks than that? We hope you enjoy the show!

 

The Whispering Wood

Welcome to the Whispering Wood.

In our performance tonight, it’s a clearing where two bands of roving actors meet, and find themselves competing to tell the best tale. In real life, it reflects an age-old English tradition of travelling theatre that we’ve supported for the last twenty years, entertaining people from Coulsdon and beyond with our open air productions. This isn’t the first time we’ve performed folk and fairy-tale based plays, having previously stage ‘Grimm Tales’ in 2003 and ‘More Grimm Tales’ in 2006. But many of tonight’s stories will probably be less familiar to you. Our author, Lucy-Ann Martin, has always been fascinated by folk tales, and she spent a year reading several hundred of them from cultures all over the globe, while travelling the world herself. She then collected her favourites and ended up with more than sixty possible tales to included in a performance. We’ve whittled these down to the final dozen or so stories that we’ll perform for you this evening. They come from all over the planet. Some are many hundreds of years old, some are far more recent, but what is amazing is just how universal the themes are.

Storytelling is a skill and a challenge we relish, and the perfect way (we thought!) to make sure the production was truly innovative was to arrange the telling of the tales as being part of a competition. The Great North Players taking on the Little Sackville Players, each trying their utmost to amuse and entertain you and ultimately gain your favour. A vote for whichever group of players did best will take place at the end of the evening, and you, the audience, will decide the outcome!

First a few thanks though. To Jeannie Lewis, who has for the second year running led the choice and arrangement of all the live music you’ll hear tonight. She and her husband Keith will be playing live at every performance, along with Simeon Dawes and Ryan Newby, just as musicians would have done in times long past. Thanks too for Jenny Moorcroft who designed the programme for us. And finally thanks to you, the audience, for coming and supporting us. Every play is a contract between the audience and the actors, this one a little more explicitly than most, perhaps. And we sincerely hope you enjoy it!

 

Catch 22

Yossarian had decided to live forever. Or die in the attempt…

Having just survived yet another murderous air raid into occupied France, bombardier Yossarian decides that the enemy isn’t just the Germans. It’s anyone who’s going to get him killed, no matter which side they’re on. If he can just get himself declared insane, he won’t have to fly any more.

Trouble is, he’s the sanest man on the base…

The original novel focused on the lives of a large number of different airmen as they try to survive both the war and the bureaucratic nightmare they find themselves in. Heller’s own stage adaptation brings the focus in more tightly on Yossarian, and as a result a number of popular characters (Orr, Dobbs, Hungry Joe, Sammy Singer and Chief White Halfoat, as examples) don’t make it into this version. However, the key themes of sanity and insanity, the power and absurdity of bureaucracy, the amorality of capitalism and the shifting definition of heroism remain. In the struggle of the central character against an illogical, intractable and unfair system, there are obvious parallels with Kafka’s ‘The Trial’ which TWC presented in the Spring of 2013.

Like John Yossarian, author Joseph Heller was a bombardier, flying B-25 Mitchell bombers based in Italy during World War II. He started to write ‘Catch 22’ in 1953, but it took him eight years to finish it. Published in the US in 1961, it was only a moderate success, but it became a bestseller in the UK and when the paperback version came out the following year it became a phenomenon, and throughout the 1960s its anti-war stance chimed with the rise of a youth culture embittered by the Vietnam war. The book royalties and movie rights (a film with Alan Arkin, Art Garfunkel and Orson Welles was released in 1970) made Heller a millionaire. In later life it was put to him that he’d never written anything better than ‘Catch 22’ subsequently. His response was a simple ‘Who has?’.

Catch-22 specified that the concern for one’s own safety in the face of dangers that were real and immediate was the process of a rational mind. If you were crazy, you could be grounded. All you have to do was ask; but as soon as you did, you would no longer be crazy and would have to fly more missions. You would be crazy to fly more missions and sane if you didn’t, but if you were sane, you had to fly them. If you flew them, you were crazy and didn’t have to; but if you didn’t want to, you were sane and had to.

As You Like It

Ever been young and in love? Shakespeare must have been, because this is a play that understands the sheer giddy joy of love, and the desperate lengths it can drive us to. ‘As You Like It’ is sometimes seen as a counterpoint to ‘Romeo and Juliet’ – love as comedy rather than tragedy. Rosalind is certainly no pale and wan Juliet, but arguably Shakespeare’s most memorable heroine. She has more lines than Juliet, Cleopatra, Beatrice and Portia, any of them. Maybe Shakespeare was just a little in love with his own creation. And who could blame him? She’s the kind of girl you’d want to spend time with, vital; brave; clever; funny and devoted. Oh, a bit of a liability too, of course, but fun to be around.

So, what’s the story? Well, firstly, there are two Dukes. The ‘good’ Duke, called Senior, has been toppled from power by his very own brother, the ‘bad’ Duke, Ferdinand. Senior is then exiled to the nearby Forest of Arden, where he seems to enjoy a carefree life hunting, shooting, fishing and singing. It seems that banishment has been more of a blessing than a curse. Meanwhile his brother’s court is an altogether darker place, full of gossip, scheming and suspicion. Now, each of the Dukes has a daughter, and the two girls are inseparable friends. It’s this that has initially prevented Rosalind from being exiled along with her father, but when Ferdinand finally casts her out, both she and Ferdinand’s daughter Celia run away. Of course, by this point, love has raised its head, and Rosalind has fallen for Orlando, a young man at court being persecuted by his less than pleasant older brother. Thankfully, he’s in love with her too, so when she leaves court for the Forest, he follows. However, Rosalind has now disguised herself a boy, calling herself ‘Ganymede’, and it’s in this form that Orlando finds her and in classic style, doesn’t recognise her. To make things more convoluted, Sylvius the shepherd boy is besotted with Phoebe, who in turn only has eyes for Ganymede!

Themes such as the liberating power of love, sibling rivalry and restitution, the healing force of nature and the simple pleasures of country life are all explored here, despite the plot being frankly ludicrous at times. And there’s a happy ending. Several in fact, as brothers are no longer at odds, lovers have put aside disguise and all is well. Except perhaps for Jaques, who has been melancholy throughout and decides ultimately to go off and be miserable in a monastery. You can’t please everyone.

The text has been trimmed in TWC’s version. Many topical gags that no doubt had them rolling in the groundlings back in 1599 are now impenetrable, and worse, not funny. If you’re a purist, prepare for disappointment, but it’s for the greater good.

There are more songs in ‘As You Like It’ than any other Shakespeare play. We’ve kept them and set them to traditional tunes. One of them, ‘What Shall He have That Killed The Deer’, shares many of its lyrics with ‘Hal-An’Tow’, the traditional Cornish May song. The version here is an amalgam of the two, complete with its reference to defeating the Spanish Armada, which at the time the play was first performed had happened just ten years previously. Many thanks are due to Jeannie Lewis who led the arrangement of all the songs and incidental music, and with the other musicians will be playing live on stage throughout the run of the show.

The Return Of The Three Musketeers

Twenty years on from his greatest adventure, D’Artagnan is disillusioned. Still only a lowly-paid lieutenant in the musketeers, his friends long gone, forgotten by the powerful people he once rescued from death and dishonour. But where once he saved a queen, a chance turn of events gives D’Artagnan the opportunity to save a King, and a King of England at that! But he can’t do it alone. Can he recruit his old comrades Porthos, Athos and Aramis from retirement? And can they save themselves from the vengeful agent of death that follows their every move?

Freely adapted from Alexandre Dumas’ own stirring Musketeers sequel ‘Twenty Years After’, this is a colourful new story of swashbuckling high adventure, fun and derring-do!

All for one, and one for all, once more!

There are two stories to be told here. One is the best part of two hundred years old, the other just sixteen.

1844. The French author Alexandre Dumas published ‘The Three Musketeers’ as a serial in a magazine. It was an immediate success, and a sequel came out a year later, and a third and final instalment two years after that. ‘The Three Musketeers’ seized the public’s imagination and to one degree or another, has continued to do so ever since.

The four great friends, Athos, Porthos, Aramis and the younger D’Artagnan became over the course of the books embroiled in plots and plans that changed history. Dumas was an avid historian and liked to show off to his readers how much he knew. Mind you, that didn’t stop him riding rough-shod over history when it suited the story!

It’s arguably the most successful piece of French literature ever. (Let’s draw a discreet veil over ‘Les Miserables’ please) There have been movies (lots of them, the first in 1903, the last one just last year), musicals (one part-written by P G Wodehouse of all people) and operas, television series and even cartoons. (those of a certain age may fondly remember ‘Dogtanian and the Three Muskehounds’ though others might run screaming from the room…) One such version was a play written by Willis Hall, which caught the eye of Theatre Workshop Coulsdon founder member and director Chris Argles.

1996, and TWC first comes to grips with the original action-heroes. Richard Lloyd played Athos, Mike Brown was Porthos and I played Aramis. We swashed buckles, waved swords and saved the day. Mike even ran across the stage naked (except for a large musketeer hat!) but only of course because the script demanded it… His grandmother was never quite the same after seeing it!

2011. We’re looking for a follow-up to the open-air success of ‘The Canterbury Tales’. ‘The Three Musketeers’ is suggested, but we really don’t want to revisit the same script because, well, we’ve done it before. Why don’t we do the sequel? Because no-one’s written one. ‘I’ll write one’ says I. The fact I’ve never written a play in my life before seemingly not a stumbling block. Ahem.

2012. Here we are. The play is written, we’ve taken the same three actors to play the original Three Musketeers, and that’s deliberate. The sequel to the first book was called ‘Twenty Years After’ and it’s not far off that between our productions. We’re all older. Probably a bit slower and a bit heavier, maybe even a little wiser. But are we growing old gracefully? Are the Musketeers? Probably not. But is that a bad thing? I don’t think so. Oh, and a note for any Dumas purists out there. I have taken huge liberties with the book. And if you have a problem with that, I’ll meet you outside…with my three friends! All for one, and one for all!